Thursday, December 8, 2011
Baby Blues/ PostPartum Depression
(keadaan selepas bersalin/semasa berpantang)
i will not elaborate on the fact of this baby blues and postpartum depression.you can google up if you want.
but im gonna write about my fact:
sebelum bersalin, when i read about this matter, i was ignorance, i thought to myself there is no way this things gonna happen to me. this must be rare. only certain people might have them after giving birth to a bundle of joy, our own baby that we waited and prepare and carried for the past 9 months.
but nOOoOOOoOo it actually will happen to everyone! everyone who actually give birth, the only different is the degree that it affect you.it can be very bad to worse. baby blues and postpartum depression is actually a different things. everyone will have baby blues but not everyone will turn out to postpartum depression.
the first day at the hospital itself i started crying already.as i cant sleep trough out the night, and when i did, it is already morning.i cant get up.i refuse to get up,i was in pain and confuse. seriously memang bingung semacam.i cry and cry. i ask the nurse for some pain killer and then i sms my mum telling her i was weak and so down. she said NO and asked me to be strong. and i did get up and mandi and asked for my baby.
but then when i went back home, things are a lot much worse. with all the problem arise i cant cope up. but i try my best but only can do with the help of my family and husband.
i noticed that:
1.i cant be left alone. i will be sad and lonely and will started to cry.
2.if i am tired, i will cry too and be so angry and restless
3.when in pain, especially nipple pain, i was so frustrated i feel like giving up breastfeeding and want to start formula
4.sorry to say , i know confinement has a lots of benefits, but all i can see i how depressing it is making me. i feel like sitting at home all the time is not healthy(dont we need some exercise to feel better) , food wise is okay since my mum cooked nice food and allowed me to eat healthy,i cant go out, when i am the type yang jenis tak pandai duduk diam, i feel gloomy and all i can do it counting the days for pantang to end. and by the time pantang ended there will be only a few days left for me to be with my baby aleena.
5.i cant seem to enjoy my baby for the first few weeks. why? because i was trying to get to know and learn her. even my husband commented on this. i am happy to be a mother but to take care of a baby is so demanding. imagine another life depend on you to survive. so yeah it is so tiring and frustrating at times when i dont know what she wants. but now alhamdullilah i even misses her when she asleep in her baby cot!
6.relationship with the husband. to tell you the truth i am very attach to mr husband. i really love spending time with him. manja. and most of the time i spent time with him 24 hours. and when aleena came along, the time is mostly spent for her, and when aleena is asleep i will sleep and when mr husband is asleep i will be awake. pergh and even a slight ignorance from mr husband will bring me to tears! owh baby blues.
7. i feel ugly! omg masa pregnant rasa diri lebih cantik? boleh? lepas bersalin my stomach is so ugly! stretch mark is so visible and black patches everywhere.they say the darker you are the easier you will get stretch mark because of pigmentation. yikes. so i am so afraid mr husband wont be attracted to me anymore.owh silly thought.now i use lulur hoping the hitamness will go away.
8.sleepless night is omg!
basically dont think much in order to feel better. with the help from others and remembrance of Allah s.w.t during your hard time insya allah will help you get trough it. i thought i was going to get crazy and i need tranquilizer stat.
and when i talked about this matter with my fellow cousin, they felt the same way! so baby blues is so common you have to prepared to face this and try to overcome it as soon as possible.
all the problem will eventually go away if you try hard to solve it and be realistic with it. it is just a test and remember as you become a parents the test begin and your responsibility will always be there forever. scary isnt it and i am only a mother for 23 days and insya allah counting.
how i overcome my baby blues:
1.never be alone unless you need a rest. i have my mother and sibling with me all the time. and my bestfriend always drop by to check on me.
2.my husband will take care of our baby from 9pm-12pm for me to get some sleep to get trough the night. alhamdullilah this helps a lot!
3.the nipple pain i just bear with it and took painkiller with guilt but at least i can still breastfeed my baby.
4.just face confinement is hoping it will end soon.
5.getting to know your baby is frustrating too but baby aleena is so adorable masya allah i am happy.
6.being ugly? beauty will fade away anyway!
7. time with husband find it as much as you can even as simple as 15 minutes alone will do.
8.sleepless night is common in parenthood so deal with it! haha